Let Me Go Bright
by WonderlandSyndrome
Summary: Pre-KHII: Thinking about a lost love is hard when you can't even love at all. - AkuRoku Drabble. - Axel 1st-Narrative.


A (very) short angst-filled AkuRoku drabble. That is how I like my AkuRoku - dripped with woe, best served cold. ^_^

**Characters/Pairings: **Axel-X-Roxas. Axel 1st-Narrative **Time Setting: **Pre-KHII

**Rating/Warnings: **K+/PG - Homosexual references. Swearing.

**Story Music: **_Trickster _by David Usher.

* * *

I remember the day you came. You were the new baby of our dysfunctional family, our band of merry heartless bastards. It was just like the first day of school, wasn't it? Everyone's cold eyes baring into you, into your extinct soul. Were you nervous? Were you scared? You didn't look it. Your blank face was like stone. One of the things I like about you. I don't know what made me do it, but I took you under my wing, showed you the ropes. I taught you how to fight, how to command the Samurais, how to be a Nobody. How to kill without thought.

Your favourite class.

I didn't know what the Superior saw in you, but I sensed something about you that was not normal. (Since when were _we_ normal?) You were old for your age. You know when to mess around and when it was time to get serious. When the others gave you crap, you throw it straight back, and then some. You were the smallest, and never the strongest but you _never_ stepped down. Your voice would go high and strained as you screamed at them. You always did have a come-back, quick-witted. You had power dancing in your shining eyes when your brow crest with frustration. You always had the last word and you would storm out of the room with head held high. Prouder then any peacock. Hell! You _were_ the cock of the walk! I would find you sitting on the stairs sometime later, arms and head on knees, being silent, distant and worlds away.

You looked so stupid.

We liked to escape. Running off for days on end without leaving a note, jumping from place to place, sampling different lives that didn't belong to us. We played on that beach, getting sand in our boots, and had snowball fights on the chilly mountains. (I let you win that time, by the way.) At night, we would sleep under the stars, unless it was raining. On clear evenings, I would make the sky burn for you. Your face would brighten with the sight of sparks and chaos. Your attractive grin made your cheeks dimple, and you would laugh to yourself, the chuckling growing louder and louder. The shows of harmful fun delighted you.

You got that off your favourite older brother, didn't you?

We got a slap on the wrists every time we went back home. I never understood why we did go back everytime. We never liked them. We would talk about leaving for good. Screw 'em! Mother-fuckers, the lot of them. We had a plan, to get a place for ourselves and live in peace. Without the Darkness. Without the bullshit. We would say it, but we never did it.

No backbone between us.

You were fun in bed. I have to admit. We would roll around in the covers, laughing as we wrestled, to see who had control that time. I'm selfish, so I would win most of the time. Like that really mattered. The way you purred and growled my name was intoxicating, making me shiver. (Would you do the same for someone else? …Very likely.) You were damned good-looking and you knew it. I would tell you this and you would deny it, but I saw that little smug grin. You shouldn't deny the truth. I never did. You called it bigheadedness. I called it confidence. You were a good fuck. You would know all my weak points and you would tease me, raking your bitten, blunt nails over my skin, scarring me even more.

You beauty.

We had a laugh - Eating ice-cream height above. I would make you chuckle and blue liquid would drip down your chin, like you were a five-year-old. I shook my head at you, wiping (or licking) your skin clean for you. We had fights sometimes. Everyone did. Objects would be broken, we would scream, we would swear until air turned blue and we would sleep in different beds for the night. We would get over it and be friends again the next day, without really meaning that word "sorry." Circle of life. Sunrise, sunset. So what? The others would get pissed-off with the bickering, would tell us to grow-up. They can talk! Too many potions were used over petty fights and spats.

Some army we were.

We wondered what life after this one would be like. Would we still be friends? Would we stick together? I hoped so. You need a mate in this unforgiving universe. You and me against everything, baby. We would have lived rough, with just each other for warmth. We would wake up together and walk for miles, see sights that no one else has. We could carve our names on surfaces (Not in a heart. That's for sissies.) We could have owned trees, rocks, rivers, caves. We would have be Kings of Nothing, Princes of Waste.

It was never meant to be.

You left, and you ruined everything. Better you then me. You were the Black Sheep of the family. You wanted to be like the kids in the town centre, snacking on sweets and talking about what you did over the weekend. I wasn't enough. No matter. I don't care. I _can't_ care. You broke it. You destroyed it. (You got that habit off your favourite brother too, hmm?) I don't mind. Live your worthless life. For now, play games and have the sun tan your body, because one day, I'll come for you. I'll get you yet. We all will. A vendetta against you. You will come back, or you will fade away.

I'll never say I need you.

Never to your face.


End file.
